I, Me and Myself

Tuesday, May 01, 2007

Saying tata is tough


 I decided to clean out my desk one day before I left my office. It took me three bags to pile up all my stuff. Eight files, millions of press releases, three nice untouched books, ten pens from conferences, photographs, my note books, a calender from the previous year, my contact cards, my mp3 player, a couple of good magazines, my CIEFL prospectus. I was surprised at the amount of stuff I had stashed away here. On my (french)window I found twenty post-its. Many holding phone numbers and some that reminded me I had four stories pending and owed someone at work about 100 bucks. Like it was going to matter anyway! I slowly slipped them away, could not throw them. Nobody was at work that day. Nobody. Nobody was even aware I was leaving the next day. I am used to being alone, a lot. I used to feel very alone when people at my work used to leave. After two good friends left work the same week, my editor called me outside and asked me if I was okay. I brushed him aside. Of course I was okay! I am here to work, I am professional enough. That was seven months ago, eleven people left after that. Thirteen for the nine months I was there. One after the other. A new person would come, sit next to me. It would take about ten days to break the ice and to teach them how the "office" worked. By the time you are expecting to go out for lunch with them the next day, they are gone that evening.

I needed more than a confidence boost to stick around and thanks to Godspeeder, I found some. I wondered how he manages. He has been there for three years- seen about close to thirty or forty people come and leave. Like a railway platform. He says he's not emotional and that keeps him at the job. A kind of professionalism, I suppose. I could never be professional enough. I could not help but get attached to these few people left with whom I spent twelve hours of my life everyday, even if it was only for a few months. I was in love with my space, my chair, my headphones and my view. That was all I needed.

The next day I would come to work, sit at my desk. Look around at the deserted venue, put on my headphones and get to work. Professional. Then new people joined and new people left, leaving behind a new contact on my msn messenger...

***
 I cleaned my desktop and kissed my slow but loyal comp of nine months goodbye. I left the blinds open. They were not there when I joined and my view was awesome. It overlooked a bachelor's pad and unfortunatley or fortunately nobody came out! I hung a bookmark for Gsp and laughed at that "smart" calender he had on his desk- a proverb everyday. I picked up three very very heavy bags and headed down. They had shut the elevator. With summer on and no rains, they were probably trying to save electricity. I walked down the stairs, 67 of them littered with cigarette buds, thanks to our office boys! It is strange when you know you are seeing things for the last time. You notice all the details.There was no farewell party, no goodbyes and good luck in whatever you do. I stepped out of the office and looked up. Said a small bye, I can get very emotional while leaving things or places. The fabmall, the pizza hut and the kitchen beyond that served the oiliest yet best aloo paranthas in the world. I looked left and it showed my ex-company's name on the big bright board. Suddenly, drops of water fell on my unsuspecting forehead. I squealed in glee as it changed tempo and became more fierce. I ran in and dumped my stuff and made an entry to what I would define as the best rainfall in many many years. The wind howled, the trees shook, the power went, my head hurt as the drops started getting very strong. People started gathering at the entrance of my office to take refuge from this downpour while I let it soak me, drench me, cleanse me. There was never a better first summer rain and there was no better goodbye.

Seen in pic: my desk and my view and my foul weather friends at work!


Posted by vidi :: 11:21 AM :: 3 wisecracks:

Post / what they thought...

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