I, Me and Myself
Wednesday, October 26, 2005
look who's counting.....178 days left!!!!
Its funny the power time has over us. I still remember when I was in the second standard. I stood in my dark green tunic outside the senior’s block at school and looked at the tall building. It was to be my home for the next nine years. At that point I vividly remember asking myself…when will I finish studying and star living?????? Only if I had known that I always knew the answer. …… but at taht point ...I was not ready for it.
I realized now…. but that does not mean that I am ready for it. But it is part of a change called growing up…its called Life’s Not Fair syndrome….
Now that the messages have started making the rounds about how we have only limited time left at college…I guess everybody is making an extra effort to make these last few days actually count.
What can I say…five years in this place and not one day has been the same. Every year has thrown up different challenges…some that have been victorious dealt with and …some…a bit of failed disappointments …but not once regretful. Wonderful people…. wonderful experiences..I have to thank god for everything I have had and many things I did not.
Next year all of this will be a thing of the past…we are all moving on and we cant stop. Its like trying to hold sand in your palm…the tighter your grip .…the more that sand slips out. Its not that I am sad that college is going to end. In many ways it’s the beginning of life actually. A new adventure. A new roller coaster ride with its own ups and downs.
Its just that….I was kinda getting fond of this old roller coaster.
Its funny how we take things for granted in life. The grass always seems greener on the other side. Two years of brilliant prospects of friendship, unity, awesome fun and even love, was lost to a lot of unwanted things now reducing us into a struggle to live every possible moment in these last few days. Our class has suddenly realized that we, as a group, are identities to their future. Everyone is frantically searching for good memories that will form their “college life”. Every one is getting to know each other and silently regretting the time wasted. Suddenly everyone is realizing that this is the end of life, as they know it. Come graduation and everyone will be on their separate ways and things will never be the same again. Everyone is searching…. for something lost…for something new…something to leave behind …for something to be a part of their lives.
Its funny how life works….
It’s all in the way you look at it right? An eternity could pass in a moment…. and a moment could last for a lifetime….
Yes…it’s all in the way you look at it.
Start looking.
Ciao
Saturday, October 01, 2005
I love him.…
He is around six feet tall, has the dreamiest dark brown eyes and a killer smile. I met him four years ago, when I was seventeen. The first look did it all. It was rather ironic. For a year before, I was unaware of his existence and after I saw him I could not stop seeing him everywhere. I never believed in love at first sight but he had decided to make me eat my words. We studied in the same college, different classes. He knew all my friends and I knew all of his but we never got introduced or even spoke. I still remember, I had to walk home with my friends and he decided to come along. Nobody knew at that time. It was December 16,2002. The evening after college had finished Christmas celebrations. I was gaily dressed in the oldest pair of salwar (dress code applied even then) with a string of green shiny streamer around my neck…. celebrating the Christmas spirit. We walked all the way from college till check-post…nobody introduced us but in an unspoken way it was understood that we knew each other. He was very sweet and even tried making conversation (mainly about the streamer) but I was too overwhelmed and just answered in one-liners. He even asked me where I lived but my other friend (who incidentally claimed to be totally in love with this same guy) was ready to answer all his questions even if they were not directed towards her. I decided to keep mum, not because I was nervous or was trying to play hard to get but coz I felt happy just walking next to him. It was perfect….he was perfect. After the walk, that lasted about 15 minutes, he headed of in his direction and I did in mine. I looked back unable to stop myself…then I fell. Not fell in love kinda fall but fell on the road…flat on my face and if it hadn’t been a red light, I most probably would not be typing with my hands at least. That event should have embarrassed me but after the walk nothing ever in my life worried me…that’s when I knew things were going to be different.
It has been three years since the walk….i never told him how I felt even though graduation day almost made it happen…. And somewhere in my heart like before…there was an unspoken thought….he always knew. And after all this time I was finally introduced to him “officially” just two months ago. It was a sudden shock and even after all this time…I felt my heart drop to my stomach as he approached me. We spoke about some stupid stuff that did not make any sense at all….but then again I was content. As I sat next to him, I remembered the number of times I had wished on a shooting star for something like this. Just taking in his voice, his smile and just sitting next to him. And as he turned and smiled…i smiled back....with understanding
He still studies in my college and has a girlfriend. I thought I should have felt bad and cried my eyes out but suddenly it did not matter. I tried in vain to get over him but now I know that I don’t have to. Sometimes….. it just feels right. Who says love makes you bitter. It is the most beautiful thing in the world.He is my first love and will always be.
Okay this was not a road trip but I thought it was a cool headline for the article. …Sorry…. post (happy k.mala?)
I went to pondy again and could not control my excitement since my name was put up.
From deciding on clothes to friends trying to remind you to get something back for them..it was just like old times;)!!!
KUDOS TO*****
*Firstly….mr. nice voice..who got drunk even before we got on the bus to pondy…wat a sight…
*…to the journey that was great….i never knew so many songs even existed
*….to ika and faustus for bringing out the true kanadigas in us and to torch boy for all the impressions and imitations…. “Torch marr” anybody???
*…to driver cheta ..for brining us to the campus at 3 am…even the registrations were not open!!!!
*…to that stupid faceless dude who kept playing samples of all songs at that weird hour! Over and over and over!!
*….to me for getting a temp of 104 on arrival and still dancing.
*…..to the lime juice costing only rupees five that was a staple food for the dance team
*…to us…. for waking up at five in the morning and going for dance practice while the rest of the world (read college) slept…..YAWN……talk about dedication.
*…to dance boy and bangla babe for fracturing and spraining their toes respectively….a day before the dance!!!!
*…to the Bhal puri, Panne puri and Cobe Manchurian…oh and two varieties of noodles…one just plain and one Nice!!!..et al.
*….to all the girls who did not wear sleeve-less shirts or shorts despite the sweltering heat while the boys conveniently paraded half dressed…so much for equality among the sexes!!.( thanks to flower teacher)
*….to all the girls who managed to wear sleeve-less despite this terror and hid it with dupattas and stoles…me included…. women’s liberation…from the heat ..I mean.
*…to “no pressure” put on the dance teams as the college banked on them to raise the points from third place to first …(sarcasm intended)…no pressure…. just the same old line….”ya the dance teams will win”…
*…to our dance teams for actually winning five places out all the six….takita-din
*…to the art rep for making the possible, impossible….which peeled out quite quickly too!!!!!!
*….to the mad ad voice over form mysore… Iaaaaa tellaaaaaa youaaaaaa the storyaaaa...AHHHHHHHHHHHH!
*…to faustus for losing a hired bike’s keys ….in the SEA!!!!
*….to the boys who played football with more energy than ever….at 2am to 3:30 am!!!!!.
*….to the college just near Christ…for dedicating an entire “mad ad” to us and making complete idiots of themselves.
*….to funny boy and woh-lamhe
*….to “stripti-kone” for striping on stage…!!!! What fun
*….to torch boy and Lajavathiye….he he he it still rocks.
* …for an awesome kathak session…..tha -dha
*…to pindi for re-recording over all the pondy tapes…ahhhhhhhhhhhh
*….to all the girls who managed to sleep only in he girls dorm…for once!!
*….to the cutest guy on the trip for being sooooooooooooo nice.
*….to the five boys who managed to go to the beach on the smallest TVS luna around…..at the same time!!!!!!…that was quite a sight
*….to me who managed with no sleep for two days continuously and still have enough energy …it showed on my face later but that’s a different story.
*…to the best ride to Oroville and hopeless shopping ever
*…to ika and me getting thrown out of the shops…. even there.
*…to the complete lack of breeze…really …nothing moved…. not even a leaf on a branch of a tree!!!!
*….the one kilometer walk to the boys dorm at 4 in the morning
*…to my voice which disappeared completely on day 3
*…to the beautiful sunrise on the beach promised and not forgotten
*…for total hours of sleep…for all six days …35 hours in 144 hours…am still recovering…
*….to the fancy lunch place ‘Ladel’ for serving food exactly two hours after ordering for it!!!!
*…to the appearance of the board exam results on mad ads day….my parents are still unaware!!!!
*…to the pathetic sand mermaid….and it’s occupant…. he he he he
*…to the last time I danced on that stage….
*…to the awesome mad ads and MPD girls skit…for a preparation of half an hour…. we were brilliant(girls that is).
*….to our room…which was never clean after dance…
*….to ‘Titanic’ and ‘Casablanca’ and silk bags…..all most every girl has one
*….to faustus for wearing my blue rocksters to the bathroom!!!he he he …definitely his colour.
*….to all the guys who were so sweet and thought it necessary to flash for me(topless only) ..that too when I had a temp of 104!!!!!! …did not help the fever just.. funny bone…..cute guy included..he he he I can see some of the girls turn GREEN.
*…to the sad 5star dinner…for which we finally had to pool in!!!!!(can u believe what flower power did?!!!)
*….to hotel Karthik…pure vegetarian food….and its delicacies.
*….to the caveman mascot….i cant remember his name…Malkyte..or something….man he was ugly.
*…to the walk after the night out….niceeeeeeeeeee
*….to the male accompanying teacher and his complete ‘maun_ wrat’….really. He did not say a word!!!..all 6 days!
*…to creator of “tannis” for not breaking any bottles….
*…oh …to tannis herself for one year of having this name.!!! Nobody calls her anything else nowdays.
*….to the two hours after dance….
*….to the very very nice purple skirt….and second windy trip to the beach….the sand… and all the talk.
*….the awesome photo of mine on the phone….wow……..
*…to the cul team for winning the overall trophy…. JUST LIKE OLD TIMES!!!!!
to the sand, the sun, the heat and sweat(which considering the heat was quite a deal). To all the people who made this trip so awesome and brilliant.
Cheers.
wHaT yOu ArE rEaDiNg HeRe
About Moi!
aT tHe mOmEnT
sO yEsTeRdAy
tHe FrIeNdShIpS
the original duck-walker :)
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since may 23,2007
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